Losing My #1 Blog Reader

My Uncle Ray Heilman passed away unexpectedly on July 27th.  

And would you believe that my uncle was one of my number one blog readers??  

He has been checking in with my blog and following up with me every day for years.  I'm going to miss that so much.  I loved knowing that he was always up to speed on our lives and that we'd have plenty to talk about when we were together.

We had seen him for dinner a few weeks earlier and he asked me all the questions about my new job, our Summer travel and plans for the school year.  He was so proud of me and so excited for this opportunity.  His health declined so suddenly.  He went from okay at that dinner to declining in the hospital.  We were all shocked to hear about plans for hospice care when we were hoping for a procedure to help heal him.  Life changes so fast!

I wanted to honor him today by telling you some of my favorite Uncle Ray stories.

1. Uncle Ray made sure to give his family first dibs on his cars when it was time for him to upgrade. I  bought a Honda Civic from him back when we were living in Utah.  He took great care of his vehicles.  The kind of guy who took care of his cars exactly as scheduled.

2. When I mentioned the kids wanting a trampoline on the blog, I received a lengthly email of articles warning of all the dangers of tramoplines and children.  He wanted me to make sure I knew the dangers of trampolines before getting one.  He was very practical and very careful.

3. He was in the floral business for years.  He had an eye for putting together beautiful arrangements, always decorated family graves with flowers, decorated the churches he was a part of and made sure to bring flowers or plants to your house when he came for dinner.  He put together Thanksgiving bouquets, flowers to coordinate with your event and made sure to love other people with flowers.  He had tons of people who loved and appreciated him in the Indiana floral business.  Anytime I shared floral tips on the blog, I would promptly get an email or text complimenting my eye for flowers.

4. He was the king of hostess gifts.  He never showed up for dinner empty handed.  He gave my mom hostess gifts for every single holiday or simple dinner he ever came to because he appreciated the efforts that went into hosting a dinner.    

5. Uncle Ray made sure I had the perfect flowers for my wedding.  He talked me through ordering my bouquet.  Simple things like picking fake Lilly of the Valley would ensure that they stayed pretty and not wilt and no one would ever know the difference.  Then he made my vision of throwing flower petals a reality.  We bought hot pink and light pink roses in bulk and he helped supervise the preparations.  He also showed up first at the reception hall to assemble bouquets for a 300 person dinner.  He was so happy to help with anything involving flowers.

6. When I went to college less than an hour away from him, he made sure to check up on me.  He'd take me out to dinner if he was passing through my college town and he would mail me gift cards to some of his favorite spots to try.  A college kid's dream come true to have a free dinner out with someone you loved.

7. He cared about my kids and always kept up with them.  He was very musical, playing several instruments so he loved hearing that Olive was carrying on the Heilman musical genes.

8. He always had a smile on his face and ALWAYS asked about you.  He cared very much about other people and was interested in you.  He'd down play himself to hear about you.  What a rare trait!  Even when we went to the hospital to say goodbye to him - he asked about us!

9. He was a night owl like me!  He rarely made plans before noon.

10. Anytime he would spot something that I'd enjoy he would text me a picture of it.

He recently sent me a rainbow picture from a doctor's office that said it reminded him of me.

We liked to shop at the same local grocery store and he sent me a picture a new section of lemon dishes that he thought I would enjoy.

He used to text when he was shopping at Target because he knew that I missed living in a city with Target.  Now we both lived in the same area with Target.

11. He sent a birthday card to every single person in the family every single year.  You could count on his birthday cards like clockwork.  

12. When we were kids, he'd buy Christmas candy in the metal Christmas tins (think Hershey kisses, Reeses cups, etc.) add a bow and give each kid a tin of Christmas candy.  He moved onto trail mix and boxes of Christmas chocolate as we got older.

I think you get the point.  Uncle Ray set the bar for being thoughtful, caring and kind.

Decorating family graves for Memorial Day.

He loved a dinner invitation.

He was an important party of planning family reunions.  It's so sad because he died on the date of our 2024 family reunion that we ended up cancelling in his honor about a week prior.

He loved my dad and was so proud to help him campaign.

I'm so thankful to have a few special keepsakes from Uncle Ray - his magazine basket, a lamp, an end table and a his set of vintage Corelle dishes in my favorite color.  I can't wait to use him in his honor.

Fun fact:

My mom and dad pointed out this picture to me.  We had lunch in my grandparent's church.  They've been gone since I was in elementary school so it was fun to see this art work in their memory.  You know I loved the rainbow art.  Maybe they loved rainbows, too??

Uncle Ray's funeral service was lovely, family and friend filled and just like he would have wanted thanks to a lot of family planning.  He would have loved us all being together.  We just hated to have to gather under the circumstances.  Uncle Ray is in heaven and no longer suffering.  We're all thankful for that, but we're going to miss him so much.