Marriage Matters to Us

It's been a while since I've written a post on marriage.  Kevin and I have been married for almost 15 years.  We dated for many years before that and have known each other since we were 5.  I have very few memories before he came along.  I know that isn't typical and we are super thankful to have each other

All that to say... Marriage is wonderful, but marriage is a lot of work.  It's wonderful work :)

It's lot of decisions that require you to think of someone else before yourself. 

To go out of your way for someone else when you don't always feel like it because you love someone. 

Being kinder than you feel like. 

Each day I make a list of ways I'm going to take care of my husband and my family as a part of my to do list.  Some times it's super easy to blaze through my to do list for them and other days it's more of a struggle.

So as you're reading my list of ways to encourage and love on your spouse, please remember that we are both working hard on our marriage.  There's nothing better than loving on your spouse. The work and effort is always worth it.

 Here are some ways we show each other that marriage matters. 

I think #3, #4 and #10 are my faves!

1. Love notes. 
Sending some love notes and snacks when he's heading out of town.  One note for each night he's away and a mix of his favorite treats.  I recently found a giant box of all the notes I've sent him over the years in a box in his office.  He says he never throws them away and likes to reread them if he's having a hard day.  He's a keeper!

2. Souvenirs. 
When he returns from said trip he brings back a little something for everyone.  Local jam for me to try and little trinkets for the kids.  It feels good to know he shopped for us and was thinking of us while he was away.

3. Date night at home. 
Sometimes I make or buy a special dessert for us to share together after the kids go to bed.  We eat and catch up on our days.  We will watch a movie together or sometimes a show.  We have different tastes in movies/tv shows so this usually involves one or both of us compromising to watch something we both will like.

4. Tag team. 
I go to meetings in the evenings and he stays home with the kids.  Life is better when we're on the same page, communicating about everything and saying what we really think/feel/need.  This is an area that we are always working on improving.  I can't expect him to volunteer to help or do things that I never mention to him.  He's not a mind reader.

5. Cheese! 
I snap pictures of us during the day and text them to him.  Sometimes the kids will caption the picture and sometimes I do.  He says it's a highlight of his day to see what we're up to.

6. He takes pictures and encourages my interests. 
He snaps my outfit pictures or pictures with me and the kids.  He's not a huge picture taker, but he has gotten better and better over the years of taking pictures.  He knows I need help with blog photos so he's my go to guy for the job.  Sometimes he'll even say... smile... this will be great for your blog :)

7. Kevin's grandpa told me when we were dating in high school that "The way to a man's heart is through his stomach." 
I try hard to bake Kevin's favorites and put a delicious meal on the table most nights.  He'd love a baked treat every night, but it usually works out to be a couple times a week.

8. I pack his lunch almost every day. 
It's my hug from home for him in the middle of his day.  I try to include a note once a week and then pack his favorite foods.  A sandwich and a fruit or veggie side.  I pack his lunch when I pack Olive's lunch.  It's super easy and it makes it a little quicker for him to get out the door in the mornings.

9. He loves sports and I support that. 
He golfs regularly, loves watching football, WWE wrestling and he is interested in sports in general.  He spent years teaching me the ins and outs of football before we had kids.  I knew nothing about football when we got married.  I was the girl in high school who went to the football games, spent the whole time talking to friends and didn't always know who won at the end of the game.  But now, I am fluent in football!  I love it, too.  I happily watch a lot of football with him every weekend in the Fall.  We enjoy football together and it's great. 

I will say that I don't enjoy all of his sports.  He loves watching WWE wrestling.  He's loved it since it was a kid.  And it drives me bonkers.  I can't stand it.  So on Monday nights he's glued to the TV and I work on other things.  You don't have to love everything your spouse loves :)  

10. Surprises.
I'll be the first one to admit that I do not love surprises.  But, Kevin does.  So I work hard to be excited about surprises he plans or to look for ways to surprise him.  I have done surprise date nights, surprise dinners, surprise outings, etc.  Last week a Better Homes & Gardens magazine arrived in our mailbox addressed to me.  He will surprise me with an afternoon text saying he'll pick up dinner on his way home or tell me to go and run some errands by myself on the weekends.  

What are some ways that you're working on your marriage right now??

I'm hoping to get back into a good routine with date nights, spend more quality time together after the kids go to bed (instead of just sitting and scrolling through our phones) and keep up with our marriage small group this fall.