1. Surprise them with their favorite things.
Pay attention to the latest trends, their Amazon with lists and what all the kids are wearing or wanting. Then surprise them with it.
Olive is very into Vera Bradley + teddy bears. She got a bag in this pattern for Christmas. After a stressful week at school, I surprised her with the matching zipper pouch and an encouraging note. She LOVED it. And loved that I cared enough to pay attention to know what she's love.
It can also be simple like adding their favorite things to the grocery list each week or restock their favorite beauty items. Olive knows where I keep my grocery list in the kitchen. She's always adding items to the list and is so happy when they arrive. I've also surprise her by making her bed, tidying up her bedroom and doing her laundry without asking her to help. She always seems to appreciate it.
2. Fix some of the little things for them.
Your teen will have many things that will stress them out or need fixing each week. Fix some of the little things to make their days less stressful. Wake up early to do their hair so they don't have to stress about it. Keep track of their schedule, remember their events and keep track of what they need to know. Check their grades with them and reach out to teachers with questions. Sometimes Olive will tell me she will handle the question and other times she will ask me to email her teacher. Or dumpster dive when one of their favorite things accidentally gets tossed.
I emptied trash cans around the house and - long story short - I threw away an art project that Olive had just made with her friends. I grabbed a flashlight, headed out to the curb on the eve of trash pick up and did some dumpter diving. I found her art. And she was so excited.
I try to do both of these things regularly to connect with my favorite (pre)teen!
These are such great tips. I never understood when I encountered mom's who seemed to "brag" about how little they did for their kids, making them learn responsibility etc. I definitely think kids need chores to learn responsibility, but what a nice feeling it is when someone does something unexpectedly kind for you like make your lunch, buy a little surprise, or make your bed. :)
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